Like most days, I find myself bombarded with emails asking me about mental illness. I realize that I realize I am not an authority on the subject but I do know about mine. This new blog will be how I address questions and accusations that I read on a daily basis. I will never disclose the sender but I will speak honestly about whatever issue I am confronted with and feel the need to respond.
I want to start out by saying I will try to show no emotion and as unbiased as possible. Although that is easy to say, it is about me and I know that there will be intimate details I will have to share in order to explain or describe certain things in order for you to understand.
I do not want to start on today's emails because it doesn't give enough insight to what or who I am. I must, however begin with this date because it is what opened my eyes to the need of this personal blog. I decided to date each entry even though the subject may not be about that day.
SHAWN: I know you have written a book about your mental illness, but do you think that you have belittled and objectified the mental health industry and those with mental illness? I find it hard to imagine that you are mentally ill. X
DEAR X: People ask me constantly if I really have mental illness because I don't act like it. I will address all of your questions but I think this one will help explain the other best. I do, in fact, have multiple mental illnesses. I am not quite sure what it is you want me to act like to confirm the statement. I think there are many people who occupy the thought that mental illness is synonymous with mentally challenged. I will assure you I have no impairment in that area. It saddened me to even write that last sentence because it made me feel as though my illness is better than an impairment. I do not mean that in any way. To those on the outside I may seem normal, which is why I take medications daily. I still have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder that medication does not even touch. My Bipolar and anxieties are what I am being treated for so that my OCD can be limited or somewhat contained. It was hiding my mental disability for so many years that caused me to finally break down and find out what was wrong with me. I have no secrets now, and a very supportive family and friends. There is not, to my knowledge, a sure fire way to tell if someone has mental illness. I'm not sure what the criteria is to look for in a stranger who says they have it. Because you are not aware of it makes me happy and realize that my medication is indeed working. The second question is very hard to answer. The question as I read it asks if I think my book shows the public that mental illness is not important *belittle*. I have never written or spoken about mental illness as being of little importance. I am not sure if you have read my writings or book but it is far from belittling. The question has two parts to it, so to answer the second part. I am not sure how to answer if I have objectified mental illness. I think we have separate understandings of certain words, so I am going to assume you mean to ask me if I am trying to benefit from mental illness. I did not start out even writing a book, I started out keeping journals about me. It was my mother and therapist who begged me to submit my work. The publication of my journals illustrates my life and the enslavement of my mind for many years. Mental illness is not something to be embarrassed about so I openly talk about it.
Thanks for your email X, and I understand what you were asking me or wanting me to know how you felt about my situation. I can only be me. I do not judge others on their situation and one day maybe others will not judge me on my situation.
The reason I felt like beginning this blog with this particular email is because it happens to be a reoccurring theme, just worded differently. Do I get offended when I am questioned about the reality of my life? I am an open book, there is nothing to hide any longer. I eventually get to all emails and answer them but the majority of them are asking me for something or wanting me to help them get published. I am unable to help in those areas. Not everyone will be as understanding about mental illness as I am, but I will continue to advocate for this cause until it is no longer possible for me to do so.
Dear Shawn,
ReplyDeleteThis sort of ignorance needs to be addressed. My daughter and I both have mental illness and currently my daughter has been hospitalized for Bipolar. We look, behave and contribute to society like "normal" people. A mom innocently asked me if I felt the need to have my daughter sterilized due to her condition. She went on to explain and voice her concern that since my daughter does have a mental illness she felt my daughter wouldn't be adequately capable of raising children. I wasn't really sure how to react or reply. My daughter is typically healthy beside a chemical imbalance that creates a need for mood stabilizing medications. She can perform all activities of daily living without any assistance. The only true impairment that she has is emotional. She is capable of learning and retaining knowledge.
People with mental illness are, in most instances, able to have and raise children. They are typically able to work in the outside world and attend the same schools and colleges as everyone else. I am so frustrated by the ignorance that mentally ill = handicapped in the minds of so many.
Rachel,
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing how the perception of mental illness=handicapped. Although there are certain degrees of mental illness, you are right. The majority can live a productive life. What I don't understand is how is it seen as a defect like it is when those with heart problems, diabetes, thyroid problems, hypertension ect are accepted. I will keep putting my voice out there and hope someone will understand that we are people, we have feelings, we love and hate the same as anyone else.